Update (06/24/10 @ 13:11): I have received a response from Guest Relations at Red Robin.
Update (06/24/10): The mother referenced in this post now has her story up on her blog. Please wander over to get the story from the source.
Recently a very dear friend of mine went out for a date with her husband to a local to them Red Robin in Kennewick, WA. She is a breastfeeding mother with an infant who has respiratory problems. During the course of their meal the child was hungry so she fed the child. As they were seated in a booth this was a bit more difficult than it would have been had they been seated at a table with chairs, but she managed to do so in as discreet a fashion as possible under the circumstances. Unfortunately this was not sufficient for some of the other patrons, and the manager, responding to complaints, asked her to cover up while feeding her child. In the state of Washington this is against the law, and when the manager was advised of this he persisted in asking her to cover up. Rather than causing more of a scene the family decided to pay their bill and leave, cutting their evening short. She contacted the company to lodge a complaint about this situation, but the response that she received was less than satisfying, with the regional manager essentially stating that they could not be responsible for every law in every state, and they do not expect their managers to be aware of these laws either. Not exactly the best business practice that I have ever heard about, and certainly a risky approach when it comes to human rights laws.
My wife and I have decided that we will no longer patronize Red Robin because of this incident, and we have both lodged complaints with the company through their customer feedback page.
I will readily admit that I am not completely up to speed on issues around this topic as my primary area of interest lies in other areas. However, this is a very important issue to my wife, therefore making it an important issue in my family. Another friend has written a fantastic educational post about the issue, and she has pointed out relevant laws pertaining to this issue. Please wander over and read the post. You will find yourself enlightened, and potentially shocked at the details of the incident referenced above that I chose to not include here myself.
In case you are interested, following is the letter that I sent to Red Robin about this incident:
I am disturbed by the actions of one of your managers, and his willful violation of state human rights laws. The incident in question was that of a mother discretely feeding her child at the table. Discretely breastfeeding her child. The manager approached this mother and asked her to cover up while feeding her child. The husband spoke up, advising the manager of their state protected right to feed the child, and that should have been the end of the matter. Unfortunately, this was not the case, and in the end, the family left the establishment rather than cause a scene.
The mother contacted your company and the regional manager overseeing this establishment contacted her later that day about the incident. Apparently the regional manager felt that the store managers were not responsible for knowing local laws, and she did not feel that it was important for her, the manager overseeing the region in question, to know the laws that would have an impact upon the businesses under her guidance.
One simple question here: Since when have those conducting business in any location not been required to familiarize themselves with the laws that directly influence their business? This has always been a standard business practice in my experience, and certain laws and regulations are part of any business owner or manager’s knowledge base. These laws are typically employment laws, public health and cleanliness regulations (especially in a food service industry), and hazardous material management guidelines.
I recognize that in a national organization, it can be difficult to stay abreast of local laws, but that is part of why a national organization has regional offices or managers. They are better positioned to be up to date on laws and regulations that affect the facilities under their leadership, and it is their responsibility to ensure that those working under them are aware of these laws and regulations. To not do so is truly a dramatic oversight that can lead to dangerous precedent and negligence.
Red Robin has been an eating establishment of choice for my family and me for a long time. I have some truly powerful memories of birthdays spent in your restaurants. I had hoped to pass these opportunities down to my own children, but in light of this act of willful ignorance, I have decided that I will withdraw my support of your establishments, and I will encourage my family and friends to do the same unless I see some minor, but relevant changes to your organization.
I understand that strategically the loss of business of my family may not be a major loss, but consider the trickle-down impact. Look at statistics regarding the impact a single dissatisfied customer can have. Now factor in that this incident has reached the awareness of roughly 1,000 potential customers nationwide, and the story is being actively spread.
What changes would encourage me to reconsider my position and return to a restaurant chain that I have frequented happily for years? Three simple things would cause me to reconsider. First, if your organization has internal guidelines regarding breastfeeding mothers and how to handle complaints of patrons about a mother breastfeeding their child I encourage you to review these guidelines on a state-by-state basis to ensure that your guidelines are not actually violating local laws. There are some very real business risk reasons to follow through on this particular item. Second, I would also encourage you to post your policy in an easily accessible location so that all mothers who may be nursing their child can read your policy and decide for themselves whether they are comfortable with your policy. Third, a public and sincere apology to the mother in question. I understand that a less than sincere apology and offer of bribe in the form of a gift card has already been tendered. Make her feel like you as an organization really are sorry that she felt that her only course of action was to leave your restaurant.
These are not difficult or particularly onerous requests and they are certainly not difficult for an organization of your size to implement. Consider the alternative of not updating policies to comply with local laws. Potential lawsuits and loss of business are a strong motive for any business to stay on top of issues like this.
I agree that Red Robin was in the wrong, but I’m one of those customers who doesn’t want to see a kid hanging on a breast while I’m eating. I have no problems with open breast feeding at places like the park, bus, train, movie, etc etc. Law protects the woman, but that doesn’t protect my appetite when it’s being spoiled by what I consider to be a stomach turning sight. Also, I’m not the only one, I’m sure there are others who are also squeamish about seeing a woman’s offspring clamoring over a naked breast, while they are fork deep in their own salad. Are supposed to just suck it up so to speak? Or is it too much to ask for a woman to cover the breast and child while others are eating? These things are extremely complicated, and while I do feel for the woman feeding her child, I also don’t want to be forced away from my favorite burger joint because a woman wants to proudly latch her spawn to her biological feeding apparatus.
I posted a longer response on your blog post, but there are a couple of core issues here. First, this is an equal rights issue, and mothers are protected in their rights to feed their child in this manner just as much as you are protected in your right to eat in the restaurant. Second, put yourself in that child’s place and put a blanket over your head while you are trying to eat your meal. Comfy? Enjoying your meal now? Other diners are more comfortable, but how do you feel? How about the other alternative that is often offered of taking the child to the restroom to feed it there? Would you want to take your meal to a bathroom stall and eat there? This is what you are asking the mother and child to do.
Now, you mentioned comfort factor, and this reminds me of similar feelings from restaurant goers a few decades ago. Remember the big civil rights issue a few decades ago? That time it had to do with letting African Americans into restaurants. Civil rights laws had just gone into place allowing ANYONE to eat in a restaurant, regardless of race, and not everyone was comfortable with that development. This is the same issue, and the sentiments are the same. We as a society have largely grown past the point where the sight of seeing somebody of a different race eating at a table next to us makes us uncomfortable, and given time the same will be true for the sight of women feeding their children.
Well said Jeff! Thank you for taking the time to enlighten others about this issue. IF someone doesn’t want to see a baby eating the way it is supposed to eat then they can look away. Babies can’t decide not to eat.
This is about the basic human right to food, not someone’s comfort level with a body part.
Travis,
Just the terms you use show your ignorance. I pity the woman who you have “spawn” with. I was a breastfeeding mother for 10 months, and my daughter would nat stand for a blanket over her head. It was my RIGHT to feed her as I saw fit. So unless you want some of your rights taken away, don’t try and take ours away.
I only wish that I had thought to bring up the racial desegregation point in my letter, but then again, that would have detracted from the focus that I was targeting with my letter. BTW, Travis is getting some traffic over on his blog post as well, and it is interesting to see a dissenting viewpoint. Wander over by clicking on his name and take a look.
Amanda,
I understand your emotional attachment to this subject, but lashing out personally isn’t appropriate and completely negates any type of point you might have made logically. I am simply speaking from the “other” point of view. Understand that not everyone wants to see a baby nurse from an unknown teat. I’m not saying repeal any laws, or even force women to cover, I’m appealing to woman’s social sensibilities. If you’re from the “Suck it up, buttercup” club then, I guess I’ll stay away from the restaurants you frequent because I don’t want to see it, and my point is there are a surprising amount of people who also don’t want to see it.
Travis: I am so sorry that you are offended so by the natural way to feed a child. What do you suggest? That my child be covered with a blanket so that you don’t have to witness them eating? It is pitiful that you find nursing in public “stomach turning”. If you don’t want to see it, here’s an idea- look away. No one is asking you to watch.
There’s something I don’t think that people are understanding here. I’m not offended. A woman’s breast is not offensive, a baby is not offensive, but put them together and something happens in my brain (and I’m sure in the brains of others) that actually causes my stomach and theirs to turn. Also it only happens while I’m eating. It doesn’t bother me when it’s outside of a restaurant, but something about putting the picture of breast feeding and eating together and get queasy. So if a mother cannot or will not cover the child, I will simply not go to popular family restaurants.
The bad thing about this is, there a lot of people like me out there. If they stop frequenting places where women nurse openly, that will seriously affect the bottom line of the businesses involved.
Just so we’re clear, I’m not against any woman breast feeding in public. I just don’t want to see it while I’m eating, and like you I spend money too. So where do we go from here?
Red Robbin is horrible. One of the waitresses had the nerve to tell my girlfriend that she was eating too much. In addition, she screwed our order up twice then charged us for extra times on our final bill. All she gave us was an insincere “sorry”. The manager was “unavailable”. When I called back later, I was “disconnected”. I tried filing a complaint online. After 3 online messages to corporate, I still have not received a response.